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 | | موضوع: CONVERSION STORY الأحد أبريل 01, 2012 12:23 am | |
| The question of why I am a Muslim, or what made me become a follower of Ahlul-Bayt (AS), is not as easy to answer as “I met so and so,” or “I read such and such,” which then altered the course of my life. As I am granted growth and enlightenment I become increasingly aware that I exhibited Islamic behaviors as far back as I can remember, and it seems as if I were born to follow this path. Early on I found myself trying to reason the world around me which helped foster logic and philosophy as my habit of mind. Indeed, some of the first thoughts I remember pondering were about God. As I experienced the world around me I not only thought of my environment in terms of my relation to it, but I also thought of God’s creation, particularly other people, in the light of being an extension of His Rahma. Naturally, I developed an amazement and love of God, which through His guidance, continued to grow. I found myself in dhikr as I pondered Him and His creation, although these were my thoughts or praises in the vernacular- as I was unaware of a deen called ‘Islam’ and the dhikrs common to Muslims.
Although I was raised in a land estrange to the teachings of Islam, its natural beauty and social perversions were sources of motivation to find God. I lived only five blocks from the forest and spent hours being drawn into its splendor where I could find a satisfaction that could not be quenched by the works of man. As I looked at the mountains it occurred to me that all people were naturally awed by nature’s beauty. Really, was there anyone that looked at it with disdain? Certainly, the same could not be said of the works of man. So then, if this was a unanimous conclusion, did it not then reveal a common origin in man that is drawn to witness the glory of the Creator? Furthermore, as I grew in into maturity I became increasing aware of social injustices, but instead of reconciling with these perversions, I yearned to overcome them.
As I grew older, in about 9th grade if I recall correctly, I objectively tried to study religion and attain closeness to God. I naturally began studying Christianity, the religion of my parents. The Biblical stories of the prophets were initially satisfying, and my childish mind led me to believe that perhaps I didn’t need to venture any further. However, it became very problematic as I examined my findings under the light of logic and history. The Bible, Paul’s story in particular, revealed a historical pattern of alteration and misuse of God’s teachings. Even if Christians could not agree amongst themselves if Jesus was God or not, the core of the problems with Christianity arose after Jesus from the way his teachings were conveyed. If Paul was at odds with others apostles of Jesus, how could they all be considered saints? Why didn’t anyone question their differences and try to conclude who was correct? When questions were raised to clarify these differences, they were always down played- as if getting a clarification would weaken a ‘true’ Christian’s faith or something. Furthermore, my experiences revealed that when people were confronted with a question they didn’t know- particularly when it brought into question a tenement of their belief- most were not wise enough to say “I don’t know,” and they futilely compared the truth to what they believed- instead of comparing their beliefs to the truth.
Eventually, the teachings of Islam reached me from a sincere source. I mention “sincere” because although I had previously read books about Islam and had met Muslims, their outlooks and understandings of the deen were not the least bit appealing. It is noteworthy to mention that while I was impressed with Islam, that the Muslims I met were often a different story. My experiences with Muslims I have encountered in the West, coupled with my experiences in the Middle East, could understandingly lead a Westerner to conclude that there must be something wrong with a religion that could render such scandalous people. I have further observed many people, perhaps most, that accept Islam later leave the deen because of the negative experiences they encounter with misguided Muslims. The only people that seem capable of reaching the truth are those that are strong enough to disregard what others are doing around them and get on with what they have to do to succeed. But, while having accumulated a good deal of negative experiences, they have been countered by meeting people that reflect the teachings of Islam. The provision that has been allotted for me to have been able met these momineen is also responsible for my guidance, alhumdulilah. Their demeanor and character far exceeded what I had previously known “good” to be.
It was a surprise to me then, as it is to many Westerners now, to discover that Islam in many regards was quite similar to Christianity and shared the same prophets, while also distancing itself from where Christianity had gone wrong. Although I was initially impressed with the teachings of Islam and the personality of the Prophet Muhammed (SAW), experience cautioned me to submit to a religion that initially sounded good; however, the deeper I dove into the teachings of Islam, the deeper the religion got.
What further inspired me was to discover how Islam was referenced in the Bible, as it says in the Qur'an (7:157):"Those who follow the Prophet Muhammed whom they find mentioned in their own (Scriptures); in the law (Torah) and the Gospel . . . follow the light which is sent down with him, it is they who will prosper.” The original language that Biblical scriptures were written in literally uses the name Muhammed or Ahmed. If you refer to Song of Solomon 5:16 in Hebrew scripture, for example, the name 'Muhammed' reads like this: "Hikow mamtaqiym wkulow mahamadiym zeh dowdiy wzeh ree`iy bnowt yruushaalaaim (His mouth is sweetness; yes, he [you'll always find in the English translations that Muhammed or Ahmed has been watered down to 'he'] is altogether lovely. This is my beloved, and this is my friend).” Quotes are also found in the New Testament from Jesus, and the Qur'an references Jesus (61:6): "Indeed I am the prophet of God to you, to confirm...who will come after me whose name is Ahmad. Yet when he brought the Jews manifest proofs, they said 'This is plain magic." I discovered one of the most apparent Biblical references in John 16:12-13: "I have much more to say to you. It is more than you can handle right now. But when the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own. He will speak only what he hears. And he will tell you what is still going to happen." And true enough, the Quran does not contain the writings or teachings of or by the Prophet Muhammed (He will not speak on his own), but it was revealed to him by God through the Angel Gabriel (He will speak only what he hears).
Eventually, I uncovered errors that needed resolved- similar to the errors of Christianity. Like Christianity, Islam was also plagued by its own ‘Pauls’. The core of the problems about Islam arose after the Prophet (SAW) from the way his teachings were conveyed. If some companions were at odds with others, or worse yet with Rasulliah’s Ahlul-Bayt (AS), how could they all be held in high esteem? Why didn’t anyone question their differences and try to conclude who was correct? When questions were raised to clarify these differences, they were always down played- as if getting a clarification would weaken a ‘true’ Muslim’s faith or something. Furthermore, my experiences revealed that when people were confronted with a question they didn’t know- particularly when it brought into question a tenement of their belief- most are not wise enough to say “I don’t know,” and they futilely compared the truth to what they believed- instead of comparing their beliefs to the truth. However, when examined in the light of logic and history, like my previous examination of Christianity, my discoveries were seemingly obvious.
Although all Muslims agreed on the paramount status of the Prophet Muhammed (SAW), it became clear that what was attributed to him was quite different. How could one clarify which teachings or historical references about the Prophet’s life were correct? Well, not only what the Prophet said about it was clear, but it is found in such abundance in the hadith of all Muslim schools of thought that it is evident that a true Muslim had to follow Rasulliah’s Ahlul-Bayt. The Prophet and the Qur’an had not only been clear about how important the Ahlul-Bayt are, but also who they were. However, once again I found people overlooking (or worse yet, going out of their way to ignore) that significant people in Islamic history were at odds with one another, and yet Muslims were in the dark or not taking sides! As if this were not bad enough, Imam Ali (AS) was attacked by Aisha in the Battle of Jamal, and Muawiyah in the Battle of Saffin, all during a time period where those that admire these rebels also regarded Ali as the reigning fourth caliph! Not only is rebelling against the authority of the caliphate clearly contradictory to Sunni hadith, but how does the obvious contradiction make these Muslims any less ignorant than Christians that will not question their own history? Furthermore, the events of the Mubahilah and numerous other hadith clearly identify Imam Ali (AS) as a member of Rasulliah’s Ahlul-Bayt which even elevates his status beyond being a “caliph”. Therefore, I resolved to follow Imam Ali (AS) to reach the truth. For me, finding the true Islam was even a more monumental event than leaving Christianity to pursue what seemed to be Islam. Finally, I remember the following hadith as a beacon that moved me, and paramount evidence to my decision to follow the Ahlul-Bayt (AS): “If I cut a faithful Muslim into pieces to make him hate me, he will not turn into my enemy and if I give all the wealth of this world to a hypocrite to make him my friend he will not befriend me. It is so because the Holy Prophet has said: "O Ali! No faithful Muslim will ever be your enemy and no hypocrite will ever be your friend.” Shukur Al-Hadi, I embraced true Islam, and accordingly took the name “Mahdi”.
Mahdi Domitrovich Shabaan, 1 427 | |
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